It’s rare that I write on relationships. Why? I don’t know. I think it’s because I haven’t had many. I was married to my high school sweetheart until the age of 33, but does that really count as relationship experience? It’s definitely relationship ‘tenure’ but is it really relationship experience? To me its the experience of being in one, a singular relationship, I consider relationship experience as the experience in multiple relationships. Some of you may disagree, but I don’t think it counts as relationship experience. Well before I go on and on, I want to share with you my experience in being in a ‘one-sided acquaintance’ or I wouldn’t exactly call this a relationship because my feelings were not involved, but it definitely was a one-sided experience.
I am very strategic when I open myself up to anyone. My belief in the Lord and his timing plays a major role as to when and who I date. On this occasion, I felt as though it was the right timing and the perfect person. I immediately opened up. Have you ever met someone and your personality and soul meshed together almost instantaneously? This was my experience with this man. He was old fashion, like me, he wasn’t a serial dater, like me, he loved children, like me…I could go on and on, and the icing on the cake was he was handsome and loved the Lord! He was quiet and calm natured which was a perfect fit for my sometimes outgoing personality. We had the most wonderful time together until I started noticing he wasn’t taking any initiative in our acquaintance. He didn’t initiate phone calls, he didn’t initiate dates, his actions were that of someone not interested. I reciprocated his efforts by pulling back and paying attention. I thought about his personality and didn’t want to jump to conclusions, because his actions fit his introverted demeanor, but the reality was I was in a one-sided acquaintance.
I could try to make his actions make since, but I would only be deceiving myself. What do you do when you find yourself in a situation like this? The answer is so simple, GET OUT. Get out of that situation. In the long run, you will only end up hurting yourself. Don’t try to make it fit, or force anything, simply walk away.
On this occasion, I got out. I realized quickly his actions spoke louder than his words. Maybe he wasn’t sent into my life to fill the position of husband/man. He could’ve been sent as a friend and we tried to pervert the original intent into something that was not meant to be.
Decide what you are going to do when you find yourself in a similar situation. My advice is before your feelings are involved and before you make any commitments with that person, observe and be true to yourself as to if this relationship will bring you contentment years to come or is it going to be a one-sided compromise, with you doing all the compromising. Ultimately the goal is to be in a healthy mutual relationship right? Be patient, don’t settle for less than what you are willing to give and stick to your standards. Most importantly trust the Lord. He knows what you need and when you need it. God bless!