I can remember so vividly, I was 19 years old, standing in the open area of the bar, surrounded by girls. We were chit chatting, just general conversation, and then it happened, a moment that could’ve changed my life forever. A young lady, I had seen several times before, approached our huddle. She had purses, shades, contacts and ecstasy for sale. Yes, she had ecstasy. Well, the other young girls in the huddle quickly bought some, then I was asked, ‘Do you want some?’ I said, ‘No, I don’t do drugs.’ Now here came the peer pressure, it was very subtle, but it was all the same. She said, ‘I do ecstasy, it’s not a drug, because I don’t do drugs.’ From that point, all the girls took their turns attempting to convince me. Well, needless to say, I did not do it. Why? Because of my standards, if you don’t stand for something you will fall for anything.
Most people equate peer pressure with ‘peers pressuring you’, but peer pressure doesn’t always come from an outside source. You can have what I call, self pressure, when you pressure yourself from within, with the intent to please someone, knowing good and well it may go against your standards. Those individuals are people pleasers. When you are confident in who you are and who the Lord has created you to be, you are not so quickly to adapt, or be pressured into pleasing people when it goes against your morals. Stand your ground.
For instance, I’ve always taught my daughter differences between a woman and a girl. I tell her a woman is able and willing to say ‘no’ when she needs to. Lets use this example, because it’s timeless and relevant. You are involved in a relationship where the subject of sex comes up. Can you say ‘no’ if it is against your standard according to the Word of God or do you feel the need to give in to the other persons demands, to please them. Now if this person truly cares for you, once you have voiced your stance they would understand and respect that. However, if they don’t they may attempt to pressure you. In this and other situations where you may feel pressured to please, remember AND hold fast to your standards verses becoming a ‘people pleaser’, giving in to pressure. Always be willing to say ‘NO’ when you have too.
If there is anyone, you strive to please, let it be our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Make His truth your standard and stick to it.
‘Blessed are those whose ways are blameless, who walk according to the law of the LORD. Psalm 119:1’